Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Thoughts on a Movember past

Truly a beautiful man moustache


I now know first hand the meaning of 'Flavour Saver', and it is in every way as disgusting as it sounds.

Winter is very slightly diminished in that my upper lip was protected from the worst of the wind and biting cold.

The sniffles however were a nightmare.. I'm sorry, but I just don't understand how you can blow your nose with one of those things and still manage to go about your day without at the very least washing your face. Every time I sneezed I just got in the shower. It seemed easier that way.

Trimming is an art. Like anywhere I guess hey?? My sister did mine...

Even girls who are disgusted by it want to touch it. Often while telling you how horrible it is, but still, that's like moustache second base.

The women who do like a moustache almost instantly become terrifying.

Gummi bears will get caught in it very easily.

It is kind of fun to stick out your lower lip and curl it up over your top lip. Your lips are sensitive enough that you can feel every hair individually, like how a baby or an E kid must feel the world. A sort of wondrous sensation

However, any flavours discovered are not wondrous. Quite the opposite really.

Pimples still happen. You'd think they'd be hidden, but nope, if anything they are grosser. See sniffles...

Moustache rides are not as popular as I was led to believe...

Also, see 'Flavour Saver' for the downside of moustache rides...

Strangely, the scents of those flavours do not seem to be noticeable.

My mothers dog did not recognize me at first. This led to a game where he barked at me and I lunged at him, which led to a small altercation in my Mothers living room where I lost a fight. Looking back he probably knew it was me and just wanted to kick my ass.

Music sounds worse.

I broke something rather expensive last weekend and am going to blame the moustache for that.

Lamination machines should come with facial hair warnings, not just generic 'Long Hair Warnings' (To be fair it was very cold in my office that day)

If you fill a piece of macaroni with glue and slide it onto a hair, it will stay there for many days. It is not generally recommended though.

I saw a unicorn, but sadly, due to my moustache, was unable to ride it.

All in all, I have to say I did not enjoy the month of stach. But I've already made a deal with people at work for next year, so I'll be going stached again...

Maybe I'll dye it green or something. Make it punk rock? What do you think??

Later people,

-Inveigh

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